Friday, May 19, 2006

How Do You Nicely Convince People to Use Without Hurting Their Feelings?

It seems the old e-mail forwards are still out there circulating and strong, and how in the WORLD do you nicely point out to your forward-happy friends that NONE of the stories they're circulating are true?? It's there for a reason. Use it!

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Once Again, The Internet is Nothing but Trouble

As in my previous post about Susan May Pratt, I suddenly had the urge this morning to recall the lyrics to an old favorite TV show of mine. I remembered that at one point, while on a band trip in high school, a classmate dared me to recite the entire thing from memory, and if I did, he would do 100 'shups (that's push-ups, for the uninitiated). I recall actually winning that dare, although I don't think he ever did his 'shups. I think he claimed that unless I could recite all of the alternate endings, it didn't count. Well, here you are, David Wellfare--pay up!

It's time for Animaniacs
And we're zany to the max
So just sit back and relax
You'll laugh 'til you collapse
We're Animaniacs!

Come join the Warner Brothers
And the Warner Sister, Dot
Just for fun we run around the Warner movie lot.
They lock us in the tower whenever we get caught
But we break loose and then vamoose
And now you know the plot!

We're Animaniacs!
Dot is cute and Yakko yaks.
Wakko packs away the snacks
While Bill Clinton plays the sax.
(or We've got wisecracks by the stacks.)
(or We pay tons of income tax.)
We're Animaniacs!

Meet Pinky and the Brain who want to rule the universe.
(or Meet Ralph and Dr Scratchansniff; say hi to Hello Nurse.)
Goodfeathers flock together; Slappy whacks 'em with her purse.
Buttons chases Mindy, while Rita sings a verse.
The writers flipped; we have no script Why bother to rehearse?

Cast : We're Animaniacs!
We have pay-or-play contracts.
We're zany to the max
There's baloney in our slacks.
We're Animanie,
Totally insaney

(alternate endings)
Here's the show's namey
Pinky and The Brainy
Come back, Shaney
The rain in Spainy
Shirley MacLainey
How urbaney
Citizen Kaney
Andromeda Strainy
Where's Lon Chaney?
Eisenhower Mamie
Miss Cellany
Chicken Chow Meiny
Dana Delaney
No pain, no gainy
Money down the drainy
Penny Laney
Tarzan and Janey
Here's the Flamey
Meet Mark Twainy
Presidential campaigny
Hunchback of Notre Damey
Bowling laney
Bangor, Mainey
Frasier Craney
Mister Haney
Quiche lorrainey
Lake Champlainy
High octaney
Public domainy

Cast : Animaniacs! Those are the facts.